day 58 & 59 - reinforce

Finally I remembered that I had a blog about my daily yoga exercises… Confession time: I haven’t done any yoga for the last two days. Yeah, deliberately and even intentionally I didn’t. I chose to cry in my bed on Tuesday. I can’t explain why I did so because I can’t figure out. It was like a physical thing. I was feeling that unhappiness in all of my cells yearning for serotonin. I couldn’t help it and cried. It wasn’t because of depression, it wasn’t because of hopelessness. I was inquiring my thoughts on this issue. Those tears were reflexive. I don’t call that sadness but clearly I was unhappy. That day passed so. I know I started this blog JUST BECAUSE I’d known these nervous breakdowns would come. I had just wanted to choose yoga over weeping. I was unable two days ago but saw that this didn’t bring me anything better. The next day, yesterday, my excuse was even worse. We went to a friend for dinner since he invited us. I thought maybe I could do yoga when I turned back home. However, I was too sleepy to do anything. (I ironed a shirt though, yeah, did you see my point? I was making up excuses.) THIS BLOG IS FOR THIS. To remember myself that I made a fucking promise. This is the first time I haven’t done any yoga for two days. Forty fucking eight hours. At least, it worked for today. I remembered my responsibility as a “blogger” and came here to confess. Think here as my sacred place then. Think that you are the priest and I am a sinner. Forgive me people for I’ve sinned.

Those six pack abs.. belong to me...

Let’s put this super sense of humour aside and talk about today’s yoga which is 42 mins. I am continuing with Fiji McAlpine and to be honest I’ve started to adore her directives & flows. For almost 3 years I am interested in yoga with Adriene but in 6 days Fiji showed me more postures and more options to flow. Besides, her gestures seem so noble that the energy she creates directly is being reflected upon her audience.

Titibasana is an asana I have never tried and even heard of. I saw some pictures before but didn’t examine the posture since I believed I could never do that. With Fiji’s flow and encouraging attitude today I tried it for the first time and saw where I was. I couldn’t straighten my legs but who cares? I will soon.

By the way, have you ever tried to do yoga with your cat? If not, give it a chance. Look at Miv showing me how to do sphinx pose though I am ignoring him and performing titibasana... 

I am so grateful that I can make more beneficial decisions for myself through yoga. The connection between my physical being and inner self is growing. I seeded the sprout of wellness. Now, watering it by my yoga practice.

You are in charge of everything in your life. You can choose anything. As Adriene says you’re in the driver seat! These two days I re-experienced this. The universe showed my weaker side just as to create a possibility of reinforcing it. I believe in me. I believe in you. Namaste!